October 1, 2007

Even Mommy's Need To Share

I put my four year old down for a nap this afternoon and walked down my driveway to get the mail. Outside, I watched the numerous city workers pondering how to fix the broken waterline outside my house and listened to their dire predictions about when I would actually get to do dishes and laundry again.
They thought they were doing me a favor by nixing the cleaning but obviously these guys have never been made aware of what it’s like to be out of panties when you need to get three kids to soccer practice in the next 15 minutes.

Hey, maybe that’s what happened to Brittney!

Anyway, I walked back to my front door with my tail between my legs to be greeted by screams of terror coming from deep within the bowels of my home.

When I finally tracked the source of the screams I realized Gabe was hollering the tear filled statement, “I HATE MY POO-POO!” and was greeted with this…..

Oh yes, that is a picture of a pair of tighty whiteys filled to the elastic with a lump-o-poo…..green poo that is. (Don’t ask me what he ate.)

You did catch the part about the NO LAUNDRY BECAUSE THE WATER LINE IS BROKEN, right? In fact, the water has been turned off to the entire house which poses all kinds of problems, namely….

How will I wash the undies?

How will I wash my hands?

How will I clean the floor?


Where is the Hershey bar I hid last week?

After a quick executive decision that no underwear is worth scrubbing that much poop out of, I tossed them in the garbage can with a satisfying slam dunk, tracked down my medicinal chocolate stash and soothed my traumatized boy with cuddles and a little bit of momma's medicine.
Because, yes, sometimes I CAN share when the situation calls for it.


nsremom said...

no words for that one. none.

mummyjaan said...

(I like your writing, Gayle. That's why I visit your blog.)

But today, this is what I want to ask you:
So, like, do you have your camera dangling from your wrist all the time for these emergencies, or did you leave your kid hollering there while you fetched your camera and photographed him in his soiled undies, or was it your high-resolution digital camera that's always to hand? Hmmm???

Hope your water supply is sorted out soon.

Leanne said...

And HOW are you going to take a shower?????

That's what I want to know!

Hope you all can stand each other's smell till the water situation gets sorted out!

Go to mom's, that's what I'd do!

I wonder if your candid stories, and now pictures of Gabe's poo, will affect him as he grows up? You may have to quit the poo stories and come up with other post fodder, to preserve his sanity!


penguinsandladybugs said...

You are always good for a giggle, Gayle!! From Brittney to the bowels of the house to the picture of undies filled with poo, you did NOT disappoint!!

Rhen (yestheyareallmine) said...

LOLOLOL You so remind me of me.
Did they give you warning about the water so you could fill a pot or a bucket for washing up just in case? Yikes!!

Cindy said...

O. My. Word.

You've topped yourself. Really. When Scott sees this it is going to seal the deal that he approves of you.

And really, the I Hate My Poo quote would make a great title for your first book.

Halfmoon Girl said...

I like that you slam dunked those tighties into the garbage. I feel a bit sorry for you, but not as much as I would if your 4 year old wasn't still NAPPING!!! How do you accomplish that? You really captured the moment with that pic- did he wonder what you were doing? Did you at least get dinner out tonight, considering your water situation?

Gayle said...

For the record:

Yep I got dinner out

I just happened to have the camera in my hand but I have been known to make the kids hold a pose so I can catch it on my very slow camera.

And it's 8pm and the water is officially back on.

Thank God cuz I DO live in a house full of boys and you know how they can get to smellin'.

chickadee said...

oh my goodness. i'm afraid the photo was TMI for me!

carrielouise said...

yes, that photo was graphic, but I must say you are a woman after my own heart with your photo journalism skills. It's good to have a like-minded friend.

Mikki said...


I've missed reading your blogs and now I know why. LOL.

It's been a long time since I last visited.

Sounds like a definite chocolate day. I'd be looking for the flavored coffee to go with it.

Scott said...

O.K. I had nothing to blog about today...so I really had no choice at all but to place a link to this post. Really, what else would people want to do more than get hijacked over to your website and forced to see your child's poop "prairie dogging it."
Thanks in advance for the joy--or horror--you'll certainly provide my friends and family.

Lisa said...

Gross! But very funny!

EE said...

Love it!!!

Llama Momma said...

Oh, man. I can so relate to this post!! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Stacy said...

OMG- This was hilarious. I laughed so hard my children were asking me "mom, whats so funny". I could not even stop for a moment to tell them. Of course they did not see the humor in this the way I did. Once again. So glad to have found this blog. I really needed this laugh tonight. I think I am a definite return reader. Your writing is amazing. Thanks for sharing.

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